My Favorite Non-Sexual Fantasies

The Unexpectedly Bi-lingual Fantasy
In this fantasy, I am perusing a crowded market in some foreign land about to purchase something expensive and amazing - a Persian rug, perhaps. Or maybe a pet monkey. And despite my white-bread appearance, I happen to be totally fluent in the local dialect and overhear the vendors laughing about how they're going to over charge me. I approach the counter, level my eyes at them and in perfect unaccented Hindi/Chinese/Bahasa say something like "Well, that approach won't make for many return customers, will it?" Ha! Fist Pump!

The Long-married Dinner Party Fantasy
I'm in my mid-fifties (and look inexplicably like Lauren Hutton) and my husband and I have thrown a big old dinner party for our nearest and dearest. We're standing about, chatting about politics/books/cheese when someone says something that relates to an inside joke between me and my mister. We make significant eye contact, stifle smiles and know that we're going to talk about that later. Because even though we've been together for ages, we're still total BFFs and still very, very into each other.

The Lazy Weekday Morning Fantasy
Integral to this fantasy is the fact that I work from home. But how I came to work from home? That doesn't matter. What matters is taking a long, leg-shaving shower, using heaps of Aveda products and stepping into a kimono post-shower. Then drinking coffee out of giant round cup while reading blogs and petting my overly fluffy cat, who inexplicably doesn't shed. Greek yogurt, fake bacon and having a pedicure also seem to play into this fantasy.

The Romantic Winter Weekend Fantasy
It's a Friday night and The Boyfriend (the one that I don't have) and I, have plans to go out, but it starts to snow, so instead, we bundle up and trundle through the snow to the nearest Blockbuster and rent some delicious 80s rubbish. We snuggle with red wine and popcorn and then spoon to sleep at the snow gets deeper and deeper. In the morning, we make the journey out again to get the Sunday paper and read it while we eat whole wheat waffles with berries and listen to the Sunday NPR lineup.

What are you favorite non-sexual fantasies?
Posted By Sarah Von


Nicole Ioma said...

The Lazy Weekday Morning fantasy and the Romantic Winter Weekend fantasy are now also on my fantasy list... those sound so perfect. Even the trudging in the snow part (though my boyfriend definitely wouldn't go for that =( )

hillary said...

The weekend fantasy is pretty much my every weekend but I have TWO cats (one cat one kitten) they do shed and the bacon is real and cooked by my husband. Even though my life it is still my fantasy or ideal I guess!

Amy! said...

Oh, how I have longed for the bi-lingual fantasy! In many a country, and many a market. But alas, I only know English. One day I will learn though, and will unsuspectingly bust it out from my blond "touron" persona! And it will be grand. :)

Being Samantha said...

All the fantasy sound blissful!
Some I've participated in already, some I wish I could have.

Mandy said...

I love these!

I have a breakfast and newspaper in bed with my devastatingly handsome boyfriend/husband fantasy that has followed me around for a while. We'd even complete the crossword together... awwww...

Heidi Rose said...

This is completely wonderful.

"chatting about politics/books/cheese"

I will have to make my own post about this.

EJ said...

The first and third one are completely bang on for me. Another one is a famous (non-specific at the moment) artist telling me that he simply MUST make me his muse. And then of course all art inspired by me being utterly incredible. Ego!

godlesscupcake said...

* I have always wished I could respond properly when people are speaking in Spanish or Italian to me. It's so sad when I understand them but cannot respond in kind...
* Finding an emotionally stable person who understands me and wants to do fun things together from time to time.
* Lazily drinking champagne and discussing existentialist philosophy on a pristine beach during the "magic hour" of dawn with aforementioned person.

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