It doesn't matter if some people have called me a "hypochondriac" or not, here are a few ways I've almost totally died, for reals.
Wire stuck in eye--When I was eight, I was playing with a fragment of old electrical wire (yeah, don't ask) and I swung it around in a big circle. Out of nowhere, I swung it right in my face, and the frayed end of the wires got stuck right on my eyelid. OK, so maybe I didn't almost die, but it was definitely a moment of utter terror.
Deer jumped on car--This really happened to me, and it was super scary, because I was going like, 75 on the freeway, and these deer were stuck in the median and couldn't get out with all the traffic. One of them panicked and literally jumped on top of my speeding car. It was awful, for both myself, my car, and the poor deer.
Forced to watch second Twilight movie in theatre--Meehhhh, maybe I didn't physically die, but my brain sure did give up its little brainy ghost.
Ran red light at busy intersection while checking self out in rear view mirror--Dudes, I looked super hot that day, what can I say?
As a child, forced to eat cold zucchini for breakfast--Yeah, my parents had the rule, "If you don't eat it for dinner, you'll eat it for breakfast." Those crazy adults were NOT playing around.
Posted by The Naked Redhead
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