Stuff to Never Say on a First Date/Meeting/Interview

As I watched some super trashy TV dating show the other day, I took in a quick breath when one dude said to his potential date, "Why are you single?  Is there something wrong with you?"  Um, yeah.  Don't do that.  Here are a few other phrases that should be avoided on that fateful first meeting with someone:

1.  "Oh yeah, you know Rachel?  I totally slept with her!"--This phrase was actually said to me on a first date, except he didn't say "slept with", he used another choice word that rhymes with "ducked".  Tool.

2.  "I'm so glad you're in this weight loss program with me!  I was hoping I wouldn't be the only really big one here."--This phrase was uttered by one who is very near and dear to me to someone she had just met at weight loss group.  Thankfully, I wasn't there.  However, even after several times of trying to explain to my near-and-dear-one why her words might have been offensive, she just kept saying, "Well, she was really big!"  Hoo boy.

3.  "Well, I wouldn't want to work in this position forever.  I just think it'd be a great way to get 'in' to the company so I can do what I really want."--I said this during a job interview.  Usually, I'm really good at interviews.  I was WAY off my game for this one.  WAY off.

What other stuff should never be said when you first meet someone?  What are things that have been said to you (or that you've said)?


That Kind of Girl said...

Oh man, the Rachel one made me gasp. Dude, though, I always want to ask guys on first dates while they're single and if there's something wrong with them. Ditto to hanging out with girls on friend dates -- if they've lived in town for a while (unlike me), it seems like a pertinent thing to know. I guess I should curb that urge though, huh?

The first-date or first-hang issue that keeps coming up for me: people immediately disclosing their mental health issues. Look, I'm not trying to be able-ist, and I understand that we all have our own mental health issues and baggage, but, dude, you need to wait for me to know you before you start telling me about your therapist!

The Naked Redhead said...

YES!! I agree. And honestly, I don't feel like it's a slight against someone's personality to struggle with mental health, but to me, it's a very personal you're right, it helps to know the person a little bit before really getting in to that stuff.

KittenMittens said...

One I hate hearing people say to another person, stranger's mostly, "When are you due?" and the girls mom says, "I told you that shirt makes you look pregnant!". Yeah.... my mom said that to 2 people so far and neither were "with child" Awkward...
I told her, "You don't know those people, so you don't actually care so don't ask!" hahaha, too harsh? :)

Chrissy said...

#3 made me cringe...ouch...we all think it but to say it sounded so

Alison said...

Oh, goodness. I tend to be on the receiving end of these statements.
1. "Honey, you shouldn't be working here. Go back to high school and have a future!" I actually WAS in high school.
2. "What size shoes do your kids wear...Oh, you're 16...I just thought you looked like you had kids."
3. "Are you pregnant?" "Oh, well. You're just really skinny and have on a big shirt." Note to self: Never wear that shirt again.
4. "Why don't you have a boyfriend? Are you a lesbian?" Really?

The worst thing I've had to say to a first date happened about 0.2 seconds after he walked into his garage. And 0.4 seconds after I got out of his Corvette.
"I,uh, have to go now. I just threw up on your driveway. Three times."
Two years later, though, Boyfriend has gotten over the trauma of that night.

niceguyted said...

"Yeah, totally: Planned Parenthood is the shiznit. Are you here a lot?"

rsparks said...

I think bringing up exes on a first date is a total no-no. Maybe some people think it's a bonding topic but I say avoid at all costs.

The weirdest thing anyone ever said to me on a date? "So, have your parents ever been in trouble with the law?" I would give you background information, but it was pretty much that random. For the record, my parents are both librarians. The most trouble they've ever been in with the law is an overdue book fine!

Rachel said...

"Oh, your sister directed that totally cool new documentary that's playing at that one place? Yeah, I'll probably illegally download that."

Said by me on Monday to a bestselling author I was trying to impress.

Melanie's Randomness said...

So how much money do you make a year? Do you have any student loans? How much debt do you have?

Did I mention that I was asked those above questions on a first date. yeahhhh.....

The Naked Redhead said...

Oh, these are all so cringe-worthy! I think the worst times are when you are the deliverer of these lines and then you sort of go into a weird time-lapse...almost an out-of-body experience...and you SEE yourself and hear yourself saying those things but you can't stop yourself. It just goes and you're like, "Ohhhh noooooooo."

Unfortunately in life, there are no take-backs.

And @niceguyted, you're a goon.

Diggestive said...

The all time classic, biggest mistake when meeting some one for the first time is :

"When are you due"

Hope Chella said...

hahah love this...Oh I can't wait for more Matchmaker on Tuesday :)

niceguyted said...

Whatever, Red. I am SO *not* a goon. I'm a handsome and debonaire gentleman blogger who knows *exactly* what to say on a first date. Figuring out the opposite of that isn't too hard. :-p

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