Conversational Missteps That Make Me Want To Hang Up On You In Real Life
Oct
20
As a dude whose two abiding interests are words and other people, it's natural that I spend something like 80% of my waking life in conversation with various friends, acquaintances and semi-strangers. With all that chatting, it's inevitable I'd run into a few selfish or uninteresting conversationalists. Here are a few rookie errors that'll send me scrabbling for an excuse to get out of the room next time you open your mouth:
Treating all curves in the conversation as unwelcome interruptions: The whole point of a conversation is that it's a living, changing organism that's given shape by two equally giving partners. It isn't an audition for the latest Mamet play, so spare me the monologues and melodramatics.
Ending a lackluster anecdote by assuring me, repeatedly: "It was soooooo funny!": If it's funny, I'm already laughing. Period.
Expecting me to remember the names of all of your friends: Unless it's pivotal to your story, I'd rather not listen to a twenty-minute dissertation on the difference between Jessica P. and Jessica H. In fact, I take this to the opposite extreme: unless it's a mutual acquaintance, I replace friends' names with bare-bones epithets (Gay Priest, Law-School BFF, The Ex, etc.) to give context without interrupting the narrative flow. Haven't heard a complaint yet.
"...but that's another story. I'll tell you in a minute!": Hold the friggin' phone, Aesop. Why don't we just finish this little tale before I decide whether I want to hear another?
People babbling so fast or ranting so hard they never let you get in a word: What's funny is, inevitably afterwards they'll flash you a starry smile and tell you what a great conversationalist you are. People, eh?
Obviously there's no such thing as a perfect conversation, but some are just beyond the friggin' pale. What conversational tics or faux pas really grease your griddle?
Posted by TKOG of Not That Kind Of Girl.
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4 comments:
oh, co-signed. in total. :)
I hate when people don't make eye contact because they're looking around for someone more interesting to them.
Don't do me any favors! You're probably not my idea of a brilliant conversationalist either!
People who talk about their friends as if you know them..."So Joe is going to LA next week." Um, who the eff is Joe? And why do I care?
I hate it when people come over specifically to talk to me, seem really interested in having a conversation, then just don't talk. Just like most people aren't interested in hearing a monologue, I'm not interested in giving one. Where's the give and take, dammit?
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